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May 2, 2014

I'd Rather Be A Selfish Christian

Do you know that many people struggle with finding happiness? Each time you feel happy, be grateful, because it is one of God's greatest gift in life. No amount of hardwork, money, self-reliance, friends, can give you this emotion. 

Ecclesiastes 5:19
"Moreover, when God gives someone wealth and possessions, and the ability to enjoy them, to accept their lot and be happy in their toil--this is a gift of God."

As we grow older, we learn that there are things we do that genuinely makes us happy, and there are things that we do because it makes other people happy. Although we're not so much into it, we still do it because when they're happy we're happy too. 

Thus, is it selfish to do good deeds to others because we ultimately aim to be happier ourselves? I don't know. I only know that in my head and in my soul, I want to do good, regardless of whether it'll make me happy or not, but it is my sinful nature that prohibits me to keep doing the good that I want. Becase my nature is selfish. 

Romans 7:18-25
"I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do--this I keep on doing."

"Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it. So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God's law;  but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members."

"What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God--through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself in my mind am a slave to God's law, but in the sinful nature a slave to the law of sin."

Then if I feel happy doing a selfless act, it is not a result of my proactive attitude in gaining happiness. It is God's gift. Because the emotion of contentment, joy, peace, happiness, are God's exclusive gifts to those who earnestly seek Him. 

Romans 15:13
"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."

Can you tell the difference between a selfish and selfless person? Selfish people may seem to be doing so many good deeds, but in their heart they know that the good deeds are for indirect, future personal gain (good reputation, self satisfaction, happiness). Selfless is when we're doing it for God. Selfish: self-aimed. Selfless: God-aimed. 

James 3:13-17
"Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic."

"For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice. But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere."

Based on this standard I'm definitely in the selfish category. Bitter jealousy and selfish ambition, i'm no stranger to this.

Focusing on God makes it easier to be selfless. Now when I do good, it's because God wants me to do good, and I obey. A lot of people seem to be wise and charitable on the outside, but only God knows the heart. I hope He'll let me stay selfless day by day as I kneel down on His presence. 

Psalm 139:23-24
"Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting."

God reveals this knowledge through bible and it clicks, so be it. Who knows what'll click later on. Just sharing that the good-looking Christians aren't all that they appear to be. Noone's exempt from sin except by God's supernatural intervention. Everyone's sinful anyway. If I was selfish and Godless, I'm really grateful that nowadays I am selfish together with God.

But alas, easier to just focus on God and loving one another. That's one true mark of Christianity. 

John 13:34-35
“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”

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