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March 15, 2013

Top 5 Regrets of The Dying

Bronnie Ware is an Australian nurse who spent several years caring for patients in the last 12 weeks of their lives. As many of her patients approached their final days, she would ask if they had regrets or things they would do differently.

Ware was so surprised by the phenomenal clarity of vision people gained at the end of their lives that she began documenting their responses.

#5 - I wish that I had let myself be happier
“This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content, when deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.”

Photo by Rosie O’Beirne, Creative Commons

#4 - I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends
“Often they would not truly realize the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.”

#3 - I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings
“Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.”

#2 - I wish I hadn’t worked so hard
“This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret, but as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.”

#1 - I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me
“This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honored even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.”

This list hit me like a ton of bricks. I hope it did the same for you.

It’s remarkable how small things that don’t actually matter can dominate our days. They seem so innocent at first. A few extra hours in the office. Forgetting to call our friends back. Bottling up our emotions. Choosing a job you don’t enjoy for higher pay.

These small decisions, while completely rational, slowly but surely pull us away from the things that matter most.

by Justin Zoradi, Storyline. Originally reported by The Guardian
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I shamelessly copypasted that piece of blog article. Yes, I think I just did. 

I heard about this cool, supertouching book from my church's sermon. Top 5 Regrets of The Dying seems like a pretty direct title of a book, free of the hassle of guessing around what the book is all about or anticipating what's inside the cover.

To me, it works as a reminder. By theory I've always known that relationships matter more than numbers or figures. What's the use of money creation if you lose all the people that you can enjoy wealth with? Contentment. That's one of the measurable thing we can measure out of a successful relationship.

Alert for Regret #1 - BE YOURSELF. Don't live up to people's expectation and waste the only chance you have to live life to the fullest. Everyone of us is created uniquely different by God, with our own passions and purposes, strengths and weaknesses. Seek clarity of who you are and what kind of person you aim to be. Then reach your destiny..

Just a pretty morning reminder. Have a blessed day.. :D

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